Posts Tagged ‘Old Geezers’

Snowbirds

October 29, 2017

There are back.  The Snowbirds are flocking back, and with them come all manner of discomfort.  The stores are more crowded, good parking is harder to find, and the waiting lists are forming at the restaurants.

The most dangerous drivers in all of the land have descended upon Florida’s Friendliest Hometown.  We have these things called round-a-bouts on three of our major streets that run north to south here, and these maniacs have no clue as to how to negotiate them.  Even thought there are signs telling you where to yield, and which lane to use to go where you need to go, the Snowbirds just barrel on through with no regard for anyone else.

Sure the businesses love them, and their money.  They are good for the local economy to be sure.  They more or less help subsidize the cost of living here, but personally I would not mind paying a little more to be here if only they were outlawed.

Let them just keep going.  They could invade South Florida.  Let them hang in Miami, or Naples, or Boca Raton, or The Keys even.  That was their tradition once upon a time; let them return to their natural habitat.  Like most birds, they are dirty, filthy creatures, and I don’t like them.  If they insist on staying warm and avoiding freezing temperatures, let them go to Hell.

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Get Back To Where You Once Belonged

October 22, 2017

I do not get all of these old geezers riding around on bicycles in packs, all dressed up like they were competing in The Tour D’ France.  However, being a free country, I readily acknowledge the fact that they have every right in the world to wear whatever spins their pedals.

What I do have a problem with is this: There are miles and miles of what are called multi-modal paths here in The Villages.  They are put in for use by non-vehicular forms of transport.  It has been discussed, researched, opined upon, and well documented that this means walkers, skaters, Segway users, golf cart drivers, and bicyclists.  Why then do these Lance Armstrong wannabes feel the need to take their lives into their hands and ride their bikes in the street?

I will tell you why.  It is because they do not want to be hindered or obstructed by the other, perhaps slower, users of the multi-modal paths.

Well, you fools, just like you, I do not wish to be hindered by your stupid looking bicycle gang when I am trying to get from point A to point B whilst driving my car.  That plastic peach pit looking piece of crap you have perched up there on your head is not going to help you much if you get yourself mowed down by a motor vehicle.  You know, one of those things that has every right to be in the street which you actually have no right to.

You have your own special paths; I suggest you stick to them.  I hate seeing the crows picking on the squirrels, possums, deer, and whatever other roadkill happens to be laying about.  It would really put a damper on my day to see them tearing away at your carcass.


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